The Day He Left

A law-abiding society. He Yu was never actually going to drag Xie Qingcheng into the bushes and make him suffer.

But there was no leaving, and in the end they both accepted their fate and made their way back to camp.

Facing each other with nothing to do, they resorted to small talk.

Which went to show that Adam and Eve may not have truly loved each other — more likely they had simply run out of other options. They couldn't very well spend all their time talking to the snake in the tree.

'Little demon,' Xie Qingcheng said.

No one but Xie Qingcheng had ever called He Yu that.

And the use of that name meant, more or less, that Xie Qingcheng was willing to talk to him properly right now.

He Yu turned his head. 'Hm?'

'…Your hand. Has it healed?'

'Completely.' He Yu smiled faintly. 'Why the concern, Dr. Xie? At the police station that day you looked like you wanted to put another cut in it.'

'…You know I genuinely have no desire to hear anyone bring up the past.'

'Then do you know that I genuinely wanted to apologize to you that day?'

'…' Xie Qingcheng raised his eyes.

He Yu's smile stayed in place, but his gaze was cool. 'This is how I talk, Xie Qingcheng. I wasn't short on remorse that day — it wasn't some capitalist non-apology, whatever you called it. My whole life people have been telling me to keep my emotions under control. Maybe you've been out of the job so long you've forgotten what you used to tell me yourself.'

A brief silence.

Then Xie Qingcheng said, 'I have been out of the job for a long time.'

'Four years.'

Xie Qingcheng said, '…I've never properly asked. How is the illness now.'

'Much better.'

He Yu smiled again. 'No need to worry. Whatever I think of you personally, I have always respected your approach to medicine. Every word of guidance you gave me — I carry it with me.'

Xie Qingcheng looked at the young man's impassive face. 'That's good. Your illness requires you to heal yourself. No matter which doctor you see, what matters most is always your own state of mind.'

He Yu was quiet for a moment, then dropped his gaze and smiled. 'Listen to that. Why does it sound so familiar.

'Ah.' He paused. The cold in his eyes surfaced. 'I remember now. You said that to me once. I still have it memorized, Dr. Xie.'

'The day you left, wasn't it…'

The day Xie Qingcheng resigned.

The day before that, He Yu had gone to the library with Xie Xue. On the walk back, rain came, and he opened his umbrella and walked her home.

'Thank you for coming all this way with me.'

'It's nothing.'

'Do you want to come in for a bit? The place is pretty small, but…'

'Would I be intruding?'

'Of course not — I'm more worried you'll find it too cramped.' Xie Xue laughed and took his hand, pulling him into the alley that led home.

Xie Qingcheng wasn't home, but Li Ruoqiu was.

She sat at the writing desk, texting someone, a smile she couldn't quite suppress on her face. She didn't even look up when her sister-in-law walked in, just said absently, 'Xie Xue, you're back.'

He Yu didn't see Li Ruoqiu often. He stepped inside and said politely, 'Sister-in-law, sorry to bother you.'

Li Ruoqiu startled at the sound of his voice and looked up. '…Oh — a distinguished guest, a distinguished guest. Come in, come in, sit down.'

She scrambled to her feet to go make tea.

He Yu smiled. 'Sister-in-law, please don't trouble yourself — I only walked Xie Xue home. I'll be leaving soon.'

'That won't do at all. Sit, I'll get you two some snacks.'

She disappeared into the back.

Xie Xue murmured, 'Sister-in-law's lovely — warm, you know. If you turn her down she'll actually get upset.'

Li Ruoqiu was clearly a woman with a strong personality; He Yu had gathered that much from their handful of brief encounters. Besides, it wasn't as though most women would seek out a cold, paternal man like Xie Qingcheng for a husband.

He sat down. The old house in the Huzhou alley was cramped — a single room divided by a curtain. A boy in his second year of middle school had already grown, and there was little left in the world he didn't understand.

This was the first time he'd set foot in Xie Qingcheng's private space. His gaze moved over the room's furnishings and paused, briefly, on the double bed half-hidden behind the gauze curtain. Something about it sat oddly with him.

It was hard to picture Xie Qingcheng and Li Ruoqiu together in that bed.

He Yu, observing propriety, looked away.

'Tea's ready — here, and some snacks too, I wasn't sure what you'd like.' Li Ruoqiu came back smiling, managing the household with easy competence: a pot of hot tea, a plate of pastries, and a small dish of sliced fruit arranged on the tray. 'Try these — I baked them myself.'

'You really are too kind, sister-in-law.'

Li Ruoqiu laughed behind her hand, her bright eyes moving between He Yu and Xie Xue with obvious amusement.

There was a gap in their ages, true, but boys grew fast at this point, and today He Yu wasn't in his school uniform — just a black autumn turtleneck, jeans, and a baseball cap. At nearly 180 cm, he didn't quite read as a middle schooler.

Sitting beside Xie Xue, who was a few years his senior, they were, in height and looks, a surprisingly natural match.

The room went quiet for a moment.

Xie Xue: '…'

He Yu: '…'

Li Ruoqiu: '…'

A few seconds passed. Li Ruoqiu let out a helpless laugh, waved her hand, and said, 'You two chat, you two chat — I'll go sit at Auntie Li's place for a while.'

'Hey.' Xie Xue said. 'Sister-in-law —'

Li Ruoqiu had already glided gracefully out the door.

The indulgent, matchmaking smile she'd worn on her way out — anyone could see exactly where her mind had gone. Xie Xue flushed crimson at visible speed.

'Um — sorry about that, He Yu. My sister-in-law watches too many idol dramas. After a while she starts reading things into everything she sees.'

'It's fine.' He Yu looked down and took a sip of the warm tea. He found that he didn't mind Li Ruoqiu's misreading at all — if anything it pleased him. He smiled. 'I don't mind.'

He had always been fond of Xie Xue. Li Ruoqiu jumping to conclusions wasn't anything to him.

'Actually — tomorrow your brother isn't on shift, but he's coming over to my place to deal with something. Do you want to come with him? Once he's done I can take you out for barbecue.'

The moment food was mentioned, Xie Xue agreed with great enthusiasm.

That evening, though, when He Yu got home, he found the living room lights on. He pushed open the door and found Lü Zhishu sitting inside, reading the newspaper.

He Yu was mildly surprised.

Lü Zhishu and He Jiwei were usually away. The He Family kept two primary residences: one in Huzhou, one in Yanzhou. The Yanzhou property was the main house; He Yu had lived there only until he was five, then been brought south. His younger brother was different — his brother had school, and his crowd of idle friends he ran around with, and the sight of his ten-talent elder brother gave him chest pains, so he stayed in Yanzhou almost without exception.

With the two brothers living on opposite banks, their parents naturally preferred to spend whatever free time they had with their sweet, guileless younger son — unless something came up, they rarely made the trip to see He Yu.

'…Why are you back?'

'Just finished a business trip.' Lü Zhishu set down the newspaper and said to her elder son, 'Sit down. There's something I need to tell you.'

The boy in his final year of middle school set down his bag, took off his shoes, and walked in. His mother had to look up to meet his eyes.

He Yu lowered his lashes. 'Go ahead.'

Lü Zhishu poured herself a glass of red wine, took a sip, and then said, 'Tomorrow is the last day Dr. Xie comes to see you. After that, he will no longer be our family's private physician.'

He Yu hadn't expected anything like this. He went still.

A long moment passed before he heard himself say, with what sounded like calm, '…How can it be this sudden.'

'Mm. I didn't tell you earlier — I was afraid you'd spend the time fretting.'

'…Why?'

Lü Zhishu didn't answer the question directly. 'The settlement is already being processed. Tomorrow he'll hand everything over to me and say his goodbyes to you. But after that —'

She took another sip of wine. 'You should stop spending time with anyone from his family.'

'…'

'You understand what I mean. We are not from the same world. This afternoon I sent Old Zhao to pick you up, and he told me you'd gone to visit Dr. Xie in Moyu Lane — you were with his sister.' Lü Zhishu sighed. 'Honestly, He Yu, you disappoint me. There's a reason they say a good neighbor is worth more than a distant relative. Every parent wants their son to keep better company than that.'

She looked him over — the boy had grown tall and broad-shouldered — then her gaze traveled upward to settle on the face that was already sharpening into something striking.

'Female company especially.'

The living room held its silence for a long time.

Then He Yu asked, 'Was this Dr. Xie's idea?'

'Leaving was his idea. Keeping your distance from his family is mine.' Lü Zhishu said it without pretense, then smiled, crossed to where he stood, reached up, and smoothed the hair back from his forehead.

'But I believe my thinking and Dr. Xie's are the same. He wouldn't want to finish a job and remain tangled up with the client unnecessarily afterward. He's an exceptionally clear-headed man — that's one of the reasons both your father and I have always respected and trusted him.'

'…'

'If you don't believe me, you're welcome to ask him yourself tomorrow.'

…

The next day, Xie Qingcheng came.

Once all the paperwork was handed over and he had completed He Yu's final monitoring session, Xie Qingcheng spoke to the boy reclining in the treatment chair, his tone unhurried. 'Your mother has told you, I assume.'

He Yu: '…'

'Starting tomorrow, I won't be coming to your home anymore.'

'If you feel unwell going forward, don't fall back on self-harm to manage it the way you used to. And remember — no matter which doctor takes over, what matters most will always be your own state of mind.'

The young doctor delivered all of this without a trace of personal feeling —

Lü Zhishu had been right. In Xie Qingcheng's mind, the boundary between himself and He Yu had always been clear. The two families were simply not from the same world. He Yu was the He Family's eldest son, He Jiwei's boy.

And he was only the doctor they had hired.

For He Yu's sake, leaning indefinitely on a single physician to manage his mental state was no good thing.

Xie Qingcheng understood this with perfect composure.

He could give his patients care, support, and genuine encouragement. But when the time came to leave, he left without looking back. He had always handled the end of medical relationships this cleanly and this completely. So his final words were simply: '…All right, little demon. I wish you a full and early recovery.'

The boy on the cusp of adolescence tamped down the fire in his chest and looked at him. '…Is that really all you have to say to me?'

'…'

He waited. Xie Qingcheng said nothing.

He Yu said, 'Fine. You don't. I do.'

'…'

'Xie Qingcheng, I've had a lot of doctors over the years. They gave me pills and injections. They looked at me the way you look at any isolated patient. You were the only one who was different.'

'I never liked you. But every word you said — I took it in completely.'

'Because you were the only one who treated me like a person capable of living in the world. You told me pills and injections weren't what mattered most. That building real connections, building a strong interior life — that was the only way I could keep going.'

He Yu stopped. 'Dr. Xie — we were never exactly close, but I…'

'…'

'I…'

The words stalled. He Yu stared at Xie Qingcheng's face, his eyes fixed and unblinking.

'I thought you saw me as more than a patient. That you saw me as a normal person with feelings.'

'I do see you as a normal person with feelings.'

'Then how can you just leave like this?' The boy's frame had filled out; when anger entered his bearing it became something with real force, something almost oppressive. 'Is this what a normal relationship between people looks like?'

Xie Qingcheng was still for a moment. 'He Yu. I know this feels abrupt to you. I should have given you more notice — you're right about that. But I discussed the matter with your parents, your father especially. He's an old acquaintance of mine, and my employer. Without a violation of principle, I am obligated to respect his wishes first…'

'And what about my wishes?'

Xie Qingcheng said, 'I'm only a doctor.'

'I'm your employer too.' He Yu stared at him. 'You're not going to ask what I want.'

'…' Xie Qingcheng sighed. 'Keep your emotions in check, young man. I have no disrespect for you. But you're still a student, and the fee your family pays is not a sum you could manage on your own.'

He Yu wasn't sure what had come over him. By then he was already composed, capable of navigating adult social settings with composure and decorum.

Yet the moment he thought about Xie Qingcheng leaving — and Xie Xue too — something helpless overtook him, and before he knew it he'd said aloud, 'I have a lot of pocket money. I could —'

'Save it for cake.'

'…'

Xie Qingcheng said, with perfect reasonableness, 'I'm not a cake. You can't go out and spend your own money to replace what your father won't buy you. I came to treat you largely as a personal favor to him. I cannot act against his wishes — do you understand?'

'Why does he need you to go?'

'He doesn't need me to go,' Xie Qingcheng said. 'I chose to leave. Didn't you just ask me — is this kind of ending a normal way for a relationship between people to conclude?'

Xie Qingcheng held He Yu's gaze.

'Yes.'

'Even though I see you as a normal person with feelings, the relationship we've built is a medical one. All relationships have a natural span. Even the parents who love you most cannot accompany you through your entire life.'

Xie Qingcheng paused. 'The time has come for our doctor-patient relationship to end. That means I should go. This is a perfectly normal ending to a perfectly normal relationship between two ordinary people.'

'…'

'The term your father and I originally agreed on was seven years.'

Xie Qingcheng looked He Yu in the eyes again. 'At this stage, having someone accompany you the way I have no longer serves your illness. Sooner or later you will have to find your way out of that darkness on your own. Do you understand?'

'…So you, like my mother, believe that after today there's no need for any further unnecessary contact between us — between me and Xie Xue — is that right?'

Xie Qingcheng said, 'Whenever you need our help, you're welcome to reach out.'

A beat. 'Beyond that — there isn't much need, no.'

'…'

'Also — your mother mentioned that you and Xie Xue have been going out alone together quite often.' Xie Qingcheng said. 'As her guardian, I have to say I don't feel that's appropriate either.'

He said this and then looked the middle schooler over, measured and composed. 'I know there's a significant age gap between you, and that what you feel for her is dependency, nothing more. But over time, people talk. That kind of talk doesn't reflect well on either of you.'

He Yu didn't bother correcting that view — rigid as it was, naive as it was. He only said, 'So you agree with my mother's position.'

'I do.'

He Yu stared at him. Stared for a long time. Then he leaned back against the chair, propped his face on one hand, and smiled — gently, quietly — and the smile was like cloud cover closing over the sun, sealing away the inch of heart he had exposed.

He Yu said, smiling, 'Doctor — you're so rational it makes a person think: you're not the one with the illness, but you have even less of a heart than me.'

'All right. Since you've said everything there is to say, you can go.'

'I'll take your words to heart, stay very calm, save myself, go on living very calmly. I wish you a smooth road and fair winds going forward.'

'But —'

The register shifted.

'Xie Xue is your sister, but she has her own freedom. Whatever you and my mother say, I'll still come to see her.'

Xie Qingcheng frowned, his gaze sharpening. 'She's a girl, and you're already fourteen. Keep some distance. Why do you insist on following her around?'

'Because she's not like you.'

Light and shadow cut a line across the floor, each of them standing in a different half — light and dark — like a single thing split in two. He Yu said, 'She is the only bridge connecting me to the world.'

Xie Qingcheng was quiet for a moment. 'Then you should find another one.'

Time was up. He had things to attend to, nothing more to say to He Yu, so he left.

That day, He Yu sat in the chair without moving.

From dusk to deep into the night.

He Yu thought: Xie Qingcheng was, in fact, a man of considerable skill.

Xie Qingcheng always had logic on his side. He was the one who told him to treat himself like a normal person. He was the one who told him a person could find their own way out of the darkness.

He had even produced a kind of illusion in He Yu — that no matter how close he stayed to Xie Xue, Xie Qingcheng, as her elder brother, would accept it.

But that day, from the choice Xie Qingcheng had made, He Yu understood: he had been thinking too much.

A contractual relationship was the simplest, cleanest kind of human bond. Whether it lasted ten years or twenty, when it ended, accounts were settled and both parties walked away owing each other nothing.

A private physician. Paid to do a job. Gone when the work was done.

Compared to the doctors who had come before him, Xie Qingcheng held nothing special. He was, if anything, crueler than the ones who had treated He Yu as an aberration — because he had deceived him the longest. He had taken the most from his blood and his pain. He was the one who made him believe what they had built could last. He was the one who made him believe his attachment to Xie Xue could ever be accepted by her family.

But he had been wrong about all of it.

He Yu turned these old memories over, looking at Xie Qingcheng's face.

So many years had passed. Xie Qingcheng was still the same Xie family's elder brother he'd always been. Not a single thing had changed.

He still wouldn't allow Xie Xue to be alone with him. He still stood in front of his sister in that same domineering, autocratic guardian's posture — even the words he used to tell He Yu to look on the bright side were identical.

Xie Qingcheng was perhaps a good doctor. He had a medical philosophy worth admiring, a fair mind, a sense of duty toward his patients.

But it was a pity. He had no heart.

'Still thinking about the past?'

Xie Qingcheng's voice pulled him back from the memory.

He Yu came to himself. '…You brought it up. I followed. And thinking about it more carefully — you probably don't remember what my manner of speaking used to be like anyway.'

He Yu smiled, finally. 'After all, what we had was a medical relationship that's already concluded. Am I right?'

Xie Qingcheng hadn't yet answered when the sky suddenly blazed white — then, with a boom, fireworks opened across the night.

The Garden Party, as it wound toward its end, always saved the most extravagant fireworks for last.

Burst after burst, a full blooming.

Xie Qingcheng said, 'Yes.'

In all that brilliance, a low roll of thunder sounded — then rain. Fireworks were fierce and tender by nature, but they were no match for lightning, which was brutal and cold, and the display guttered out quickly. In the distance, students laughed and scattered for the classroom buildings and dormitories. Fat drops hammered down on the festive, earthly noise.

He Yu held the same thin smile, face darkening with the sky. 'Then let's find shelter together, Dr. Xie. Thinking through it with your clear-headed logic: outside of the medical relationship, you're now my teacher's elder brother. If you get soaked, I'll have no way to explain myself to her.'

A pause, still edged with irony. 'Two people whose medical relationship has concluded sharing shelter — that counts as ordinary behavior. No breach of propriety, no inappropriate conduct. Right?'

Xie Qingcheng knew, beneath all of it, He Yu still resisted him.

But Xie Qingcheng had no patience or goodwill left to coax him along either. He said, coolly, 'Right.'

He Yu smiled. 'There's a cave up ahead. After you, Dr. Xie.'

.

While He Yu and Xie Qingcheng were on the island looking for shelter from the rain, the Upperclassman was still diligently earning his pay on the other side — standing guard at the entrance, turning away anyone else from the Garden Party who wandered too close.

The Upperclassman figured that at this hour, most people would be done with their evening by now. The chances of anyone being so bored as to come all the way out to Neverland just to get a stamp were pretty slim, so he'd let himself relax a little.

'Man, this rain is something.' He sat philosophically in the duck boat, craning his neck toward the island with the shameless curiosity of someone hoping to catch a glimpse of something interesting.

The distance was too great. He had only caught a vague impression earlier — He Yu and someone with quite a slender figure. His nearsightedness meant he couldn't make out much; he'd thought the girl was unusually tall, probably close to 180 cm, maybe in heels.

The Upperclassman thought Young Master He had singular taste. So into tall girls.

Hah… the life of a capitalist was something else.

The more he thought about it, the more his imagination ran away with him. He was awfully curious about what those two on the island were up to now that the rain had come down. Neither of them had brought an umbrella. Neverland had only one cave, which most students never bothered with — and it was squarely in a blind spot on the school's surveillance grid. The Upperclassman had heard certain couples liked to come to that cave late at night for a more private kind of activity, and by his reckoning, a man with He Yu's looks and resources, who'd gone to all this trouble to pursue a 180 cm beauty, had definitely already gotten what he came for.

Should he text the capitalist and offer to sell him a little something?

The Upperclassman thought it over and took out his phone.

Confession night, home run — that was the pace of modern life, wasn't it?

So the Upperclassman began composing a message, intending to send it to the number He Yu had left unblocked, and fleece a little wool from that capitalist's coat —

'Boss He, there's a first-aid kit in the cave on the island — second shelf has a few boxes of condoms. If you need any, just look in the box. Send me a red envelope when you've used them…'