Twelve

Su Xingchuan mustered his strength and carried Li Xuan all the way home.

The few steps from the door to the bedroom were a bit of a struggle; he stumbled slightly and almost fell on top of Li Xuan.

Li Xuan smelled of alcohol, but it wasn't unpleasant.

Su Xingchuan's nose accidentally brushed Li Xuan's forehead. They were so close that his Adam's apple bobbed involuntarily.

As much as he wanted to take advantage of the situation, to collapse right onto Li Xuan and hold him in a deep sleep — fulfilling a long-held wish — what mattered most right now was helping Li Xuan sober up.

The server said Li Xuan had been drinking alone all evening. Four or five glasses of hard liquor, and he'd passed out right after.

Li Xuan was a good boy in this respect: he never touched alcohol, not even liqueur-filled chocolates.

So you can imagine how much he must have hurt himself tonight.

Su Xingchuan had always taken Li Xuan's health very seriously. So even though Li Xuan's red, moist lips were right there, he managed to hold onto his formidable self-control. After pausing for a few seconds, he planted both hands on either side of Li Xuan's shoulders and pushed himself up.

He first took off Li Xuan's coat.

Li Xuan was limp and pliant, which made it relatively easy.

Su Xingchuan dug out a set of his own pajamas from the closet and helped Li Xuan change into them.

As he was taking off Li Xuan's pants, he noticed a scar on his right knee. He froze, remembering how Li Xuan had fallen when they went hiking back then and left that mark. When they broke up, the wound was still scabbing over.

Su Xingchuan hadn't expected the scar to still be visible—a faint brownish mark, like a tattoo, a tattoo documenting the time they'd been in love.

He stroked it with his fingertip, and Li Xuan began to whimper again.

Probably because his legs were exposed and he felt cold.

Su Xingchuan didn't have time to enjoy the view. He grasped Li Xuan's calves, diligently pulled on the pajama bottoms, then lifted the blanket and wrapped him up tightly.

Worried he'd be cold, he turned up the heat.

Li Xuan, feeling comfortable, rolled over and hugged the blanket.

He still liked to sleep like this.

After settling Li Xuan in, Su Xingchuan went to the kitchen.

He pulled celery and tomatoes out of the fridge and blended them into a thick vegetable juice to help with the hangover.

Since starting work, he'd had plenty of social obligations. Su Xingchuan had a good personality and fit in everywhere, so naturally he was often the face at these events. He not only had to drink but also had to cover for his boss. If a client had a high tolerance, getting drunk was a common occurrence.

When he got home, he'd force himself to stay awake and blend a vegetable juice to soothe the acid in his stomach.

He never thought he'd have a chance to share it with Li Xuan.

He went to the bedside and called for Li Xuan to get up.

Li Xuan naturally didn't respond. He got annoyed, huffily covering his head with the blanket. Su Xingchuan had no choice but to sit on the edge of the bed, fish him out, and coax him in a soft voice. Using a tone much like before, he said a few things you'd say to a kid. Only then did Li Xuan condescend to half-open his eyes, press both hands against Su Xingchuan's chest, and push him weakly. 'You're so annoying.'

Su Xingchuan took all of Li Xuan's complaints in stride. He expertly pressed the glass to Li Xuan's lips and held his chin.

'Baby, just one sip.' Su Xingchuan coaxed.

Once Li Xuan took a sip, Su Xingchuan upped the ante. 'Half a glass more, just half, and then you can sleep.'

'So bitter.' Li Xuan pouted.

Su Xingchuan took a taste. 'More tomato than celery. How's that bitter?'

Forced to drink a bit more, Li Xuan got testy right away. He buried his face in Su Xingchuan's neck, his anger tinged with tears. 'It's awful. You're dead...'

Su Xingchuan laughed. 'How am I dead?'

Before, Li Xuan had been spoiled and proud, throwing little tantrums without fear of upsetting Su Xingchuan. But if Su Xingchuan teased him back, he'd get mad, poke Su Xingchuan's shoulder with his finger, and say, 'You're bullying me. You're dead.'

Li Xuan was drunk; maybe he thought it was seven years ago. He buried his face in Su Xingchuan's chest, grabbed his collar, and said, 'You're dead, Su Xingchuan. You're about to lose your wife.'

Su Xingchuan's heart tingled.

Li Xuan had called his name.

The name he'd called was Su Xingchuan.

Did that mean Li Xuan still remembered him deep down, still thought of the good times, hadn't forgotten those days?

He set the glass on the nightstand, turned back, and wrapped his arms around Li Xuan like a gift recovered. He stroked Li Xuan's back with his palm and murmured, 'I haven't had a wife for a long time. My wife got lost seven years ago.'

'Got lost,' Li Xuan repeated sleepily.

Su Xingchuan bent down and kissed him. 'Yeah, lost.'

It wasn't the first time Li Xuan had called himself 'wife.'

He never got hung up on titles.

During those few months of dating, he'd used all kinds of embarrassing endearments without needing any coaxing from Su Xingchuan. Sometimes if he overheard another couple on the street, he'd mimic them right away. Su Xingchuan was often caught off guard, his ears burning, and he'd cover Li Xuan's mouth, laughing helplessly. 'Show some restraint.'

Li Xuan would still call out through his fingers, 'Hubby.'

Blinking innocently.

Su Xingchuan knew full well it was deliberate, and yet his heart still fluttered.

Seven years later, he still hadn't improved. One complaint from Li Xuan and his defenses crumpled, an arrow straight to his heart.

'Xiao Xuan, have you thought about me all these years?'

Li Xuan didn't answer. He shifted uncomfortably, frowning, because Su Xingchuan's belt was digging into his waist.

Su Xingchuan unbuckled the belt. Just as he was pulling it free, Li Xuan placed his hand on it. Su Xingchuan's breath caught.

Li Xuan's hands were beautiful.

Hands that wielded a scalpel, well-cared-for hands, long and clean, with distinct knuckles, pale as jade.

In winter they were always icy, needing to be tucked into his arms to warm up for ages.

'Have you thought about me?' Su Xingchuan asked again.

Li Xuan was already fast asleep.

Su Xingchuan held his hand and gently rubbed the web between his thumb and forefinger. He gave a self-deprecating smile. 'I really missed you.'

'After graduation, I kept trying to find out about you, but you cut ties with everyone. I asked your roommate, your classmates. They all said they didn't know.'

'I wanted so badly to know how you were doing — if you were okay, if you were happy, if someone was taking care of you.'

'Honestly, I was conflicted. Part of me wished you were doing well, but part of me wished you weren't — so you'd come back to me.'

'Why did you leave me back then?'

'After I treated you so well, you ungrateful little thing.'

Li Xuan, bothered by the noise, grabbed the edge of Su Xingchuan's shirt and pressed it over his ears.

Su Xingchuan's lips quirked helplessly.

Su Xingchuan didn't know why Li Xuan had suddenly gotten wasted tonight. He kept feeling it had something to do with him, but he was afraid of flattering himself.

He pulled the belt free, lay down a little lower, and rested his forehead against Li Xuan's, feeling the rhythm of his breathing.

Li Xuan slept peacefully.

Su Xingchuan looked at him and blew a soft breath across his face. Li Xuan's brows furrowed slightly, and his long, curled lashes fluttered.

Su Xingchuan pinched his ear, frustrated. 'Is Xu Zhengdong even a good person? He fooled around so much when he was young. He could sell you out and you wouldn't even know. I'm the only one who'll always treat you right. You know that?'

Li Xuan, feeling ticklish, tried to burrow under the blanket.

Su Xingchuan kissed him.

He captured his lips, careful as if holding a precious treasure.

His breath was hot, his heart racing out of control. Su Xingchuan wanted nothing more than to devour the person in front of him.

Li Xuan actually responded, even pressing closer into his embrace. Su Xingchuan couldn't hold back. He was about to roll over and pin him down, but he stopped himself. He buried his face in the crook of Li Xuan's neck and took a deep breath.

After washing up, he lay down beside Li Xuan.

He'd originally planned to leave in the middle of the night, but with Li Xuan in his arms, as soon as he closed his eyes, exhaustion swept over him.

He hadn't expected to fall asleep so quickly.

He couldn't even remember how many minutes it took to slip into slumber. The next thing he knew, he woke up, and it was already morning.

He'd slept too deeply, too well.

Not a single dream, just opening his eyes to daylight.

When Su Xingchuan woke, he was dazed for a few seconds, terrified that everything since picking up Li Xuan at the hotel had been a dream — a steamy dream he'd long fantasized about. Upon waking, the pillow would be empty, and everything would vanish.

He held his breath and reached out to touch the blanket beside him.

Empty. Cold.

His heart plummeted, as if he'd fallen off a cliff.

He turned to look. Li Xuan was not lying next to him.

Not there.

Was it really a dream? A dream?

The next second, a loud crash came from the bathroom — the sound of a glass bottle hitting the floor.

Su Xingchuan froze for a moment, then bolted to the bathroom.

Li Xuan was crouched on the floor, picking up shards of glass.

Wearing his pajamas, hair a disheveled mess.

Seeing Su Xingchuan charge in, he was startled. He looked up, still shaken, his eyes wide.

Su Xingchuan's breathing was still ragged, his chest heaving. His tall frame loomed menacingly in the bathroom doorway, as if he were about to interrogate him fiercely.

For a moment, Li Xuan forgot his usual feigned coldness. He instinctively pouted, a hint of barely perceptible grievance in his expression.

'You didn't screw the lid on properly, it's not my fault...'

Just as shameless as before — whenever he made a mistake, he pushed the blame onto Su Xingchuan.

Su Xingchuan breathed a sigh of relief.

How to describe Su Xingchuan's feelings at this moment? His suspended heart settled gently onto cotton. Excitement, ecstasy, the gratitude of a close escape rained down on him like a downpour.

Lost and found again. Reunited after a long separation.

For the first time, he felt lucky.

Li Xuan slowly stood up, set the half-empty jar of face cream on the counter, and muttered, 'I'll pay you back.'

He always spoke softly when he'd done something wrong, lacking confidence.

Su Xingchuan leaned against the doorframe and deliberately teased him, 'Sure, I remember this one was over a thousand.'

'A thousand is a thousand.'

As a third-generation rich kid, Dr. Li couldn't care less.

He tried to squeeze past Su Xingchuan and leave the bathroom, but Su Xingchuan didn't let him go. His shoulder was as solid as a rock; Li Xuan couldn't get out. The bathroom smelled of face cream. Li Xuan was wearing Su Xingchuan's cotton pajamas, a bit too big, the sleeves covering his fingers. Su Xingchuan's heart softened. He couldn't shake the feeling that they shouldn't be like this — they should have been a couple who'd been together for years.

'Do you remember what happened last night?' he suddenly asked.

Li Xuan froze.

Su Xingchuan deliberately looked down at Li Xuan's collar, his tone nasty. 'Little Dr. Li, you're just as clingy as before, pestering me nonstop and snuggling up to me.'

Li Xuan's face instantly went pale.

'You even called me hubby.'

Li Xuan's hands balled into fists inside his sleeves. He snapped, 'Stop it! Shut up!'

'Why were you drinking alone at a bar last night?'

Li Xuan instinctively avoided his gaze and said stiffly, 'It's none of your business, and I never asked you to pick me up.'

'No good deed goes unpunished, just like before.'

Li Xuan couldn't stand Su Xingchuan bringing up the past so much. He pushed hard into the gap between Su Xingchuan and the doorframe, knocked his shoulder aside, and rushed out of the bathroom.

His shirt and pants were by the bed. He hurriedly put them on, buttoned them haphazardly, grabbed his coat, and got ready to leave.

Su Xingchuan said from behind, 'Have some breakfast at least.'

Li Xuan's footsteps halted abruptly.

He actually wanted to stay, but his reason wouldn't allow it.

Without answering, he put on his shoes and left without a word.

Su Xingchuan had expected as much, so he didn't try too hard to stop him. He stood by the entryway for a long time, until it was time for work, before he finally recovered from this too-good-to-be-true morning.

Back in the bedroom, staring at the warm bed, he thought: When would he get to hold Li Xuan in his sleep again?

For his seven-year insomnia, Li Xuan was probably the only cure.

.

Meanwhile.

Li Xuan's mother pushed open his door to call him for breakfast, only to find he hadn't come home all night. She quickly called Li Xuan — it was off. She called several times in a row; still off.

Li Xuan's father was on a business trip abroad, so his mother lost her anchor. She immediately called Xu Zhengdong over and asked him to figure out how to find Li Xuan. 'Xuanxuan has been so preoccupied lately. What are we going to do? Someone has to look after him.'

After making a call to a friend, Xu Zhengdong turned back to comfort his sister. 'Sis, don't panic. I actually have someone in mind — age, looks, personality all suitable for Xiao Xuan. I'll arrange for them to meet in a couple of days. Don't cry, just relax.'

Xu Zhengdong contacted a few friends, and after some searching, found traces of Li Xuan at a bar on Changting Street.

His friend told him grimly, 'Mr. Xu, the surveillance camera at the entrance caught Xiao Xuan, but—'

Xu Zhengdong's heart tightened. 'But what?'

'Xiao Xuan was carried off by a man.'

Xu Zhengdong shot to his feet. 'What?!'

His friend, equally worried, turned the screen toward Xu Zhengdong and zoomed in on the video. 'Come and see.'

Xu Zhengdong looked immediately.

At 11:49 p.m. the night before, the door of Grey Shore Bar was pushed open. Someone who looked like a waiter stepped out first, then turned and gestured to the person behind him. A few seconds later, a tall man in a black casual outfit emerged carrying Li Xuan.

Li Xuan was clearly drunk, his arm dangling limply.

Xu Zhengdong's heart leaped into his throat. He said furiously, 'Who is that guy? Zoom in!'

His friend grew nervous too and immediately had the bar staff enlarge the footage several times. 'Mr. Xu, I'll call the police first.'

Xu Zhengdong said in a deep voice, 'Already called the cops. When I catch this punk, I'll skin him alive—'

He stopped mid-sentence.

As the image was enlarged, the man in black's face became clearer. Xu Zhengdong peered closely; it looked kind of familiar. The next moment, the man turned his head slightly and smiled at the waiter.

Xu Zhengdong froze on the spot.

Su Xingchuan? How could it be him?