—

Your clothes have already been washed and dried — they're hanging outside your room. Come downstairs for breakfast after you get up.

When Xu Ze woke up and reached for his mobile phone to check the time, the first thing he saw on the screen was this message. He sat up from the bed at once, then drew a sharp breath from the pain.

He sat in a daze for a while, his state like that of a hangover — naked, waking in a strange bed, thoughts sluggish, memories tangled. Yesterday Lu Heyang had taken his clothes along on his way out; Xu Ze had originally meant to wash and blow-dry them himself in the bathroom.

He climbed slowly out of bed, fished up a towel and wrapped it around himself, then cracked the door open just enough to pull the clothes inside. Even lifting his legs was a struggle; only after washing up and pacing the room twice did he adjust, a little, to the new day.

Xu Ze straightened the bedding, opened the door, and went downstairs. Lu Heyang's house was large, spacious, and quiet. The housekeeper stood at the foot of the stairs waiting for him and reached out a hand to guide him toward the dining room. Xu Ze was deeply unused to this; he bowed his head to the housekeeper several times in succession and murmured 'thank you.'

Breakfast was already laid out, and Lu Heyang seemed to have only just begun eating himself. When Xu Ze came into the dining room, he only glanced up once, with no other reaction. Xu Ze lowered his head and sat across from him, and began eating his breakfast in silence. The housekeeper stood two meters away, quietly waiting for them to finish.

It was the most elaborate breakfast Xu Ze had ever eaten, but he seemed to taste nothing in it; from beginning to end he did not once lift his head.

His toe was suddenly touched. The hand holding Xu Ze's spoon paused — he thought he had stretched his legs too far, and was about to pull back, when he felt Lu Heyang slowly brush past the side of his foot, circle around to his heel, and press his calf against Xu Ze's. Their two legs twined together, soundlessly, beneath the table.

The tablecloth at both ends of the table was long, falling nearly to the floor, and blocked the view perfectly. Xu Ze stared at his bowl in a daze, his whole body taut; the injuries were still visible on his face, so that he looked as though he had been beaten into a stupor and left sitting there.

Lu Heyang set down his spoon, took a sip of milk, and asked, 'What's wrong?'

Xu Ze looked up. Lu Heyang's expression appeared entirely normal — as though the leg under the table belonged to someone else.

'Nothing.' Xu Ze shook his head, a little unnaturally, and went on eating his breakfast.

When breakfast was over, Lu Heyang and Xu Ze went upstairs together and each went into his own room. Xu Ze rinsed his mouth and meant to wash the towel; in the bathroom he examined the bottles and jars one by one, trying to find one that could be used for laundry. While he was still searching, the door was knocked twice, and Xu Ze went to open it.

Lu Heyang walked in carrying a small plate of sliced oranges and closed the door behind him. He set the fruit on the table, picked up a segment, and held it out to Xu Ze. 'Resting?'

'I wanted to wash the towel.' Xu Ze's eyes were lowered; he did not look at him. He took the orange and bit into it mechanically. 'Looking for laundry detergent.'

'There's none in the room — it's all in the laundry room downstairs,' Lu Heyang said. 'The housekeeper will take them down to wash together later.'

Xu Ze could only nod. Then he heard Lu Heyang ask, 'Does it hurt?'

The question made Xu Ze's gaze dodge even further. He licked, without thinking, the orange juice from the corner of his mouth. 'No… not really painful.'

'Did you clean yourself up afterward?' Lu Heyang — whether out of genuine concern or something else, it was impossible to tell — asked, in any case, another question Xu Ze found difficult to answer.

'…Mm.' Heat rose to Xu Ze's face; his discomposure was plain. Yesterday, on the way to the bathroom, the thing that had slid down his thigh from behind — that ticklish feeling would not leave his skin.

Lu Heyang moved closer to him at that moment, the tips of their noses separated by only half a centimeter. Lu Heyang looked at him and said, 'I haven't tasted it yet. I don't know if today's orange is sweet.'

'It's sweet,' Xu Ze answered softly.

His breathing grew a little quick, and an illusion took shape in his mind — that he could kiss Lu Heyang now.

Perhaps it really was only an illusion, but Xu Ze still leaned forward and pressed a kiss to Lu Heyang's lips. He only dared such a brief, dragonfly-light touch — but Lu Heyang wrapped an arm around his waist and did not let him pull back, kissing him deeper, until Xu Ze, a few beats late, parted his lips and, still very awkwardly, began to answer the kiss.

The inexperienced Xu Ze was the real Xu Ze. Lu Heyang felt that Xu Ze could stay awkward forever — there was no need for him to grow skilled.

After a few minutes of kissing, Xu Ze was panting. He suspected that Lu Heyang's pheromone must contain some trace of alcohol — otherwise why did it make him feel so dizzy and drunk?

'Yesterday I didn't stay with you longer. Would you be unhappy about it?' Lu Heyang asked him.

'No.' Xu Ze's eyes were dazed. He had not been unhappy — only a little hollow. But if Lu Heyang had stayed at the time, his sense of shame might well have dragged on longer; he might have buried his face in the pillow for the entire night.

'Usually, with friends, it's in the living room. It was your first time here — staying too long in your room wouldn't have been appropriate.' Lu Heyang's hand brushed once along Xu Ze's waist as he explained.

Xu Ze had also seen the surveillance cameras in this house. He thought that installing cameras at home was a normal and necessary thing for people like Lu Heyang — but hearing Lu Heyang say this, he suddenly began to mind. He could not quite remember exactly how long Lu Heyang had stayed yesterday; it should have been under an hour, but he did not know whether that counted as long.

'What about now?' Xu Ze asked, worried. 'Will it be too long?'

From the moment he had come in to now, not even five minutes had passed. Lu Heyang answered, 'Maybe.'

Xu Ze grew only more worried.

'In a couple of days I'm going to summer camp,' Lu Heyang said. 'For a month.'

'…' Xu Ze was, for a moment, a little stunned. He sat blankly for a few seconds before answering, 'Then have a good time.'

'I'll try,' Lu Heyang said, with a small smile.

Xu Ze's lashes drooped in silence, as though hesitating. In the end he still asked, 'After summer camp ends, will you still come back?'

'I will.' Lu Heyang pinched the back of Xu Ze's neck and tilted his head up a little, looking into his eyes. 'When I'm back, I'll come find you at your place.'

Xu Ze felt a little more at ease. He nodded, trusting Lu Heyang's words completely. 'Mm.'

'Finish the oranges. The driver will take you home. I have something to do later — I can't see you off.'

'Okay.'

Lu Heyang let go of his hand and said, 'Then I'll go out first.' He walked toward the door, and as he walked he heard slow footsteps behind him. He turned around — Xu Ze was, as expected, following.

'What's wrong?' Lu Heyang asked, already knowing the answer.

Xu Ze was not good at expressing reluctance; he could not say it. He pressed his lips together, glanced at Lu Heyang, then looked at the floor.

'Can I kiss you again?' Xu Ze asked quietly.

Lu Heyang had heard, but still asked, 'What?'

'I want to kiss you again.' Xu Ze summoned his courage and repeated it.

Lu Heyang did not answer the question, but asked Xu Ze instead, 'When do you go to work?'

Thinking the topic had been steered away and he had been, in effect, refused, Xu Ze's embarrassment deepened until he could no longer meet Lu Heyang's eyes. He answered, 'The day after tomorrow.'

'I see.' Lu Heyang picked up the wristband from the nightstand and fastened it onto Xu Ze's wrist, adjusting the setting. The area on Xu Ze's wrist that had been burned by the cigarette had scabbed over, leaving a few intersecting scars, still faintly uneven to the touch. Lu Heyang's gaze lingered there for a moment, then moved away.

He drew Xu Ze a small step closer to himself and asked, 'Do you, before doing something, give someone advance notice — I'm about to do something that'll make you happy?'

Xu Ze was baffled. He felt he had never done anything that made anyone happy, let alone given advance notice. He answered, 'No.'

'Then from now on, don't ask if you can kiss me.' There was a smile in Lu Heyang's eyes.

It was a roundabout way of putting it, but Xu Ze — usually slow to catch on — understood quickly this time. He tried, slowly, to hold Lu Heyang's hand back, so nervous that his ears had gone red, and asked, 'Is this something that makes you happy?'

'Yes,' Lu Heyang said, looking at him. 'Everything you do is.'

For an instant his heart beat very fast — so violently that his chest felt swollen. Xu Ze had been deliberately avoiding the question of why Lu Heyang had done what he did yesterday; even when he let himself think about it, at most he only dared to guess that Lu Heyang had acted out of sympathy, or being moved — though Xu Ze did not feel that receiving a small silver pendant was something worth Lu Heyang being moved by.

If anyone ought to be moved, it was himself. Lu Heyang had given him so much — things he had thought of and things he had not — far beyond what he had expected; more than once Xu Ze had been struck by Lu Heyang's generosity and left uneasy by it.

He had not known that the things he did could make Lu Heyang happy.

That conclusion was more precious to him than everything Lu Heyang had given him; for Xu Ze, it was already enough. He was a person who had never dared to expect even a single candy, and now he had been given a whole roomful.

Xu Ze pressed his lips together again — that faintly smiling look — and a small light kindled in those deep grey eyes. He seemed to have run out of words; he was even so satisfied that he did not need to kiss Lu Heyang. Just this answer alone was enough to let him pass the month, or longer, of Lu Heyang's absence at peace.

'Don't give the wristband back to me again.' Lu Heyang squeezed the palm of his hand. 'Keep wearing it.'

Xu Ze looked at him and nodded, seriously.