Sixteen

Since Li Xuan was a beginner who'd never touched a skateboard before, the Senior Student stayed by his side and taught him, starting from the most basic moves. Li Xuan didn't glance at Su Xingchuan even once.

Su Xingchuan thought to himself: Fine. I'll just do my own thing.

He set his skateboard on the ground. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw the Senior Student holding Li Xuan's arm, helping him figure out his dominant foot. Li Xuan's whole body seemed weak — he kept leaning in the Senior Student's direction. The Senior Student laughed and said something, and Li Xuan laughed shyly along with him.

Su Xingchuan had originally worried that Li Xuan had some social anxiety and would be really uncomfortable in an environment full of strangers.

Turned out Li Xuan was way more composed than he'd imagined.

Su Xingchuan suddenly felt that skateboarding wasn't all that interesting anymore.

He'd only joined this club because his roommate had dragged him into it. Now his roommate never showed up, and Su Xingchuan had to drop by every once in a while because he'd made a few friends in the club. Actually, at his height, he wasn't really suited for skateboarding anyway.

Just as he was feeling bored, a friend from the Skateboarding Club happened to walk over and ask what he'd been up to lately, since he was never around.

Su Xingchuan forced a laugh. 'The Debate Team keeps me busy.'

His friend said, 'It's getting colder and colder. In another month, the roads'll probably be icing over. The club wants to go hang out at Baijiang Park together before it completely freezes, sometime before New Year's. You in?'

Su Xingchuan couldn't absorb a word the Senior Student was saying. He stared at the steps ahead, but his attention stayed fixed not too far away.

He listened to the sounds coming from over there.

'Xingchuan, are you in?'

'Huh?' Su Xingchuan caught his friend's words half a beat late. He politely declined. 'I don't think I'll go. I'm not very good at skating.'

'What's up with you? You're totally spaced out.' His friend looked puzzled.

Su Xingchuan flicked a glance at Li Xuan, who was chatting with a girl. Su Xingchuan immediately turned his head back and said to the Senior Student, 'Nothing's up. What do you mean spaced out? I'm just—'

Before he could finish, a girl's startled cry rang out not far away. Su Xingchuan looked toward the sound and saw Li Xuan sprawled on the ground.

His skateboard had rolled far off.

Without a second thought, Su Xingchuan ran over.

Li Xuan was sitting slumped on the ground, both hands propped behind him. He looked shaken, his lips pale.

Su Xingchuan asked him, 'Are you hurt?'

Li Xuan looked down and said nothing.

Su Xingchuan checked his right hand, moved his wrist around a little. 'Did you twist it here?'

Li Xuan didn't make a sound. Su Xingchuan's voice grew urgent. 'Say something. Wrist, ankle, knee — where are you hurt?'

Li Xuan lifted his eyes and gave him a look.

Then he lowered his head again and muttered under his breath, 'You're being too mean.'

Su Xingchuan was speechless. For a moment he honestly didn't know what to say.

He was being mean? Wasn't he supposed to be? For no good reason, this little young master had latched onto him, nearly stolen his first kiss, and now Su Xingchuan got scolded just for being a little sharp. He really owed this guy.

'Did you hit anything when you fell?' Su Xingchuan asked, gentler now.

Li Xuan said, all pitiful, 'My butt.'

'Can you stand up?'

Li Xuan had just started reaching a hand toward Su Xingchuan when Su Xingchuan immediately understood and said flat out, 'I'm not carrying you. Get up on your own.'

Li Xuan instantly yanked his hand back, huffy.

The two of them were stuck in a standoff like that.

Su Xingchuan wouldn't carry him, so Li Xuan wouldn't get up.

Eventually, people from the Skateboarding Club drifted off one by one. Only a scattered few remained in front of the auditorium, and the surroundings grew quiet.

Su Xingchuan said, 'What are you doing here?'

Li Xuan was blunt: 'Looking for you.'

This deliberate avoidance over the past few days had worn them both out. Su Xingchuan sat down beside Li Xuan, sighed, and tried to reason with him. 'Stop wasting your energy. Li Xuan, I really don't like guys. If you keep this up, we can't even be friends.'

Li Xuan looked confused. 'I don't want to be friends with you.'

The corner of Su Xingchuan's mouth twitched.

In all his life, Su Xingchuan hadn't never been pursued, but this was the first time anyone had given him such a headache. Li Xuan wouldn't yield to soft or hard tactics. If Su Xingchuan went soft, Li Xuan immediately took advantage; if Su Xingchuan went hard, Li Xuan put on that pitiful act and begged for sympathy.

Su Xingchuan genuinely had no idea how to deal with Li Xuan.

A real problem.

An evening breeze hit Li Xuan's face, and he sneezed. He sniffled and mumbled, 'Why don't you have a girlfriend? Someone just said there are several girls chasing you.'

Su Xingchuan gave him a sidelong glare, pulled a tissue out of his pocket, and handed it over. 'What's it to you?'

'It matters to me.' Li Xuan glared at him.

Su Xingchuan glanced around, then asked in a snide tone, 'When you fell, why didn't that Senior Student just now come help you up?'

'What Senior Student?' Li Xuan tilted his head.

'The one in the white short-sleeve shirt just now. I remember he's a physics major, a junior this year,' Su Xingchuan said deliberately. 'Is he the type you gay guys go for?'

'I don't know. I don't have a circle.'

He was clearly playing innocent, speaking all slow and drawn-out. Then, while Su Xingchuan wasn't looking, he rested his little pig trotter on Su Xingchuan's leg and tapped Su Xingchuan's knee with it, pitching himself. 'Forget about the Senior Student. He's not as good-looking as me. I'm really great.'

Su Xingchuan found it funny.

First he laughed at Li Xuan's way of thinking, then at himself.

He turned his head toward Li Xuan and asked, 'Great how? Great that you still need someone to feed you at twenty years old?'

'I'll treat you really well. I can buy you anything you want. I like you.' Li Xuan said it seriously and sincerely.

Those last few words made Su Xingchuan's heart jolt.

For Su Xingchuan, who had never once doubted his straightness for the past twenty years, those words hit him like a shockwave.

Su Xingchuan grew a little flustered and hurried to his feet. He urged Li Xuan, 'It's already dark. Hurry up and get up.'

Li Xuan looked up at him and held out both hands.

Su Xingchuan frowned. 'I can pull you up, but you can't hug me. And you can't... you can't kiss me.'

Li Xuan nodded.

Reluctantly, Su Xingchuan reached out, grabbed Li Xuan's wrists, and hauled him up. Li Xuan didn't take advantage and do anything shady the way Su Xingchuan had expected — both hands hung obediently at his sides.

Su Xingchuan bent down and dusted the dirt off Li Xuan's pants.

Li Xuan stood there, docile and still.

'Su Xingchuan, do you really hate me?'

Su Xingchuan didn't answer right away.

Li Xuan looked down and asked, 'If you don't absolutely hate me, can you take me off your blacklist?'

Su Xingchuan's movements froze for a second.

'I sent you messages and you didn't reply to a single one. I don't like that. And I got you a present.'

'No need.'

'But I already bought it. It was so hard to find — it's an NBA All-Star Signed Basketball.'

Su Xingchuan said, 'Really, no need.'

'You hate me.'

'Aren't you the one who hates me?'

Li Xuan froze for a moment. 'You got my messages?'

Su Xingchuan: '...' He'd let it slip.

Li Xuan beamed with surprise. 'You didn't block me! You saw all the messages I sent!'

Su Xingchuan sighed in exasperation. 'Yeah, I saw them all. I don't reply and you track me down all the way here. Real fun, isn't it? Can't you tell I don't want to deal with you?'

Li Xuan pursed his lips — it looked a bit like a pout, a bit like he was asking for a kiss. Su Xingchuan averted his gaze and said coldly, 'Anyway, I don't like guys. Don't bother me anymore.'

Li Xuan stared at him steadily. Su Xingchuan thought Li Xuan was upset, but then to his surprise, Li Xuan's lips suddenly curved into a smile.

When he smiled, faint dimples appeared.

'As long as you didn't block me, that's fine,' he said.

'...'

It suddenly dawned on Su Xingchuan: Li Xuan was the ultimate poster child for selective perception — he only absorbed the information he liked.

Su Xingchuan picked up Li Xuan's skateboard and handed it to him.

Li Xuan hugged it to his chest. 'I'm heading back to the dorm.'

The spring in his step as he left was surprisingly light — he hopped up the steps, leaving Su Xingchuan standing there at a loss, speechless.

That very night, Su Xingchuan got a message from Li Xuan.

Cat Cat Head: [image]

Cat Cat Head: [This is Bobo. He's a silver tabby, and he's my profile picture. He's super cute and I wanted to share him with you.]

In the photo, Li Xuan was sitting on the sofa in a white sweater, with the cat sleeping on his lap, perfectly content.

Su Xingchuan looked at Li Xuan in the photo.

There was no denying it — Li Xuan was really good-looking.

His features were delicate and fine, his skin pale, and his eyes seemed to speak, like bright, glistening glass marbles.

Cat Cat Head: [I'll only send you ten messages a day. I won't bother you. Please don't block me.]

Su Xingchuan thought about it, and in the end he replied [mm].

Cat Cat Head: [Goodnight. moon.jpg]

He probably fell asleep happy.

Su Xingchuan, on the other hand, couldn't sleep well.

Ever since Li Xuan had planted a loud kiss on his cheek, Su Xingchuan hadn't had a single decent night's sleep. He kept dreaming. After a whole week straight of insomnia and restless dreams, he finally crashed.

He caught a cold.

His temperature was running high, too — 38.8 degrees.

When he went to the Campus Hospital to pick up medicine, he ran right into Li Xuan, who was walking out of the Library with his head down, looking at his phone.

The next second, Su Xingchuan got a message from him.

Cat Cat Head: [Are you out of class yet?]

Cat Cat Head: [Going to the canteen at noon? I heard the North District Canteen has mung bean soup today. I want some.]

Su Xingchuan let out a cold scoff.

Was this really how you chased someone? Su Xingchuan had thought that last sentence would be 'there's mung bean soup — do you want some? I'll buy it for you.'

Su Xingchuan watched as Li Xuan walked toward him.

He was wearing a backpack, walking forward step by step. The sunlight turned his hair a lighter shade and made his skin look even fairer.

Cat Cat Head: [Which canteen are you going to?]

Cat Cat Head: [Reply reply. You always waste my message quota like this. So annoying.]

Great. Now he was annoying again.

Nobody had ever agreed to a ten-message-a-day limit. He'd come up with that himself, and now he was blaming Su Xingchuan for it.

Su Xingchuan: [Moody little clingy pest.]

Cat Cat Head: [I knew you were seeing these!]

Su Xingchuan: [A clingy pest like you can't be in a relationship. Who could put up with that?]

Cat Cat Head: [You.]

Su Xingchuan: [I can't put up with it. I don't like you.]

Li Xuan stopped replying. Su Xingchuan's finger hovered over the screen, a little regretful. There'd really been no need to tease him like that.

He'd said 'I don't like you' a ton of times, and Li Xuan never listened.

Su Xingchuan watched Li Xuan walk to within five meters of him. Li Xuan was still looking at his phone, and he'd probably seen Su Xingchuan's reply — the smile had vanished from his face. He looked miserable.

He still hadn't noticed Su Xingchuan at all. Just as he was about to walk right past him, Su Xingchuan reached out and grabbed his backpack, warning, 'There's a hole in front of you.'

Li Xuan froze for a few seconds, then his face suddenly broke into a smile.

He spun around and walked up to Su Xingchuan, surprised and delighted. 'What are you doing here?'

'Just passing by.'

Li Xuan tilted his head and looked at him, the sparkling laughter in his eyes abruptly shifting to worry. 'What's wrong? You don't look well.'

'Aren't you studying medicine? Can't you tell what's wrong with me?'

Li Xuan felt Su Xingchuan's forehead with the back of his hand. 'A little warm. Do you have a fever?'

Su Xingchuan stepped back, dodging his hand. His voice was a little hoarse. 'Mm. I'm on my way to the Campus Hospital right now.'

'I'll go with you.'

'No need.'

Li Xuan insisted stubbornly, 'I'll go with you.'

He followed behind Su Xingchuan to the Campus Hospital. The doctor prescribed Su Xingchuan a box of antipyretic detox capsules. Li Xuan took the medicine box, studied the instructions with utter seriousness, muttering to himself.

Su Xingchuan asked, 'Figured anything out?'

'Do you know how to take medicine properly? Should I go to your dorm and look after you?'

Su Xingchuan let out a light laugh. 'I'm not like certain people who need someone to feed them over a tiny scrape. I think I can manage to take a capsule when I have a fever.'

Li Xuan was clearly unhappy.

He handed the medicine box back to Su Xingchuan.

Sometimes Su Xingchuan felt that Li Xuan was really self-absorbed. Like right now — Su Xingchuan had thought Li Xuan would say a few caring words or ask him what he wanted for lunch, but he didn't.

Li Xuan just walked with his head down, glancing at him every so often. Su Xingchuan said, 'I'm going back to my dorm to lie down.'

Li Xuan opened his mouth but didn't say anything.

Su Xingchuan went back to his dorm, took his medicine, downed half a mug of hot water, and then climbed into bed to sleep.

He slept straight through until the afternoon.

He got up intending to order delivery, but his roommate said, 'Xingchuan, a girl sent you some really nice food. It's on the desk.

Su Xingchuan was puzzled. 'A girl?'

'Yeah, some girl had someone bring it over. She said you had a fever and some plain congee would do you good.'

'When did this come?'

'Just now.'

Su Xingchuan immediately headed out the door and downstairs.

He had a vague suspicion.

Sure enough, he spotted Li Xuan.

Li Xuan hadn't left yet. He was standing there, head down, typing a message. Su Xingchuan hadn't brought his phone, so he didn't know what Li Xuan was sending.

So he crept up behind Li Xuan and leaned over to look.

Cat Cat Head: [I bought a serving of plain congee.]

Deleted.

Cat Cat Head: [I went to several shops before I found this congee, plus some side dishes, and steamed dumplings with vegetable filling.]

Deleted.

Cat Cat Head: [Don't know if you'll like it]

Deleted.

Cat Cat Head: [Baidu Answers: Plain congee is rich in nutrients, replenishes energy, boosts appetite when you have a cold, helps with hydration, and speeds recovery.]

Just as he was about to hit send, Su Xingchuan spoke right next to his ear: 'You fussed over it again and again, and that's what you ended up with?'

Li Xuan jumped in fright, then turned his head around, dazed.

There was a hint of a smile in Su Xingchuan's eyes as he asked, 'Cat Cat Head, maybe you should go online and learn how to chase someone?'